Smart JokesSmart Jokes

Evolution of a Programmer

What Programmers Say vs. What They Mean

"Hello world" is usually the first example for any programming language. While small test programs existed since the development of programmable computers, the tradition of using the phrase "Hello world!" as text message was influenced by an example program in the seminal book "The C Programming Language".
To write a program that displays or prints "Hello World" is however, more a practice for students, to get used to the environment of any programming language. It does not make use of the algorithmic capabilities that are the true power of any programming language.

Hello World — By different types of programmers

This is a very funny joke not only for programmers but also for neophytes. It is not necessary to read all the coding lines, but make sure to read the statement in the "Manager"-Section. Maybe some of you have already heard or read about this one because it's rather old, but just to re-live the fun, here it goes:

High School / Junior High

20 END

First Year in College

program Hello(input, output)
    writeln('Hello World')

Senior Year in College

(defun hello
  (cons 'Hello (list 'World))))

New professional

void main(void)
  char *message[] = {"Hello ", "World"};
   int i;

   for(i = 0; i < 2; ++i)
     printf("%s", message[i]);

Seasoned professional

#include <iostream.h>
#include  <string.h>
 class string
  int size;
   char *ptr;
   string() : size(0), ptr(new char('\0')) {}
   string(const string &s) : size(s.size)
   ptr = new char[size + 1];
   strcpy(ptr, s.ptr);
   delete [] ptr;
   friend ostream &operator  <<(ostream &, const string &);
   string &operator=(const char *);
 ostream &operator <<(ostream &stream, const string &s)
   return(stream  << s.ptr);
 string &string::operator=(const char *chrs)
  if (this != &chrs)
    delete [] ptr;
  size = strlen(chrs);
  ptr = new char[size + 1];
     strcpy(ptr, chrs);
 int main()
   string str;
   str = "Hello World";
   cout  << str  << endl;

Apprentice Hacker

$msg="Hello, world.\n";
if ($#ARGV >= 0) {
  while(defined($arg=shift(@ARGV))) {
    $outfilename = $arg;
    open(FILE, ">" . $outfilename) || die "Can't write $arg: $!\n";
    print (FILE $msg);
    close(FILE) || die "Can't close $arg: $!\n";
else {
 print ($msg);

Experienced Hacker

#include <stdio.h>
#define S "Hello, World\n"
main(){exit(printf(S) == strlen(S) ? 0 : 1);}

Seasoned Hacker

% cc -o a.out ~/src/misc/hw/hw.c
% a.out

Guru Hacker

% cat
Hello, world.

Junior Manager

20 END

Middle Manager

mail -s "Hello, world." bob@b12
Bob, could you please write me a program that prints "Hello, world."?
I need it by tomorrow.

Senior Manager

% zmail jim
I need a "Hello, world." program by this afternoon.

Chief Executive

% letter
letter: Command not found.
% mail
To: ^X ^F ^C
% help mail
help: Command not found.
% damn!
!: Event unrecognized
% logout